An-ticipation

October

2010-02-03T20:41:00.000-08:00

October began with An attending her friend Mollie's 3rd birthday party. An was invited to a birthday party shortly after coming home, but I don't think she really understood what was going on. For Mollie's birthday, however, it all came together and started what has become a near daily ritual. "Momma (or Bo), when An's Happy Birthday to You?" It's in May honey, we tell her. For a while, May was good enough. Then I think she learned the months in school and realized just how far away May was. Now she tells everyone who will listen that An's birthday is May 7th and she will be FIVE. She even tells you whose birthdays are happening before her birthday and is excited that the list is getting shorter.

Mollie's party was at a gymnastics place and An had a great time swinging on the ropes and jumping (or being thrown) into the foam pit. Seeing her swing on the rope brought back memories of one of the pictures we received while waiting for her...one of those that cemented in our minds that this was a tough, make your own fun kind of girl:
Hanging out in Vietnam

Hanging out in the US

Also in early October, we had to figure out how to explain Halloween to An. Hmm, you get dressed up, knock on people's doors and get candy! Thankfully at four, she really wasn't interested in the why - the promise of candy was good enough for her. However, choosing a costume was a chore. So many options: Spiderman, a Jedi Knight, Yoda, a tiger, a ride-on horse. Notice that there is not one "girly" option in there. My efforts to get her into a princess costume or anything remotely feminine were met with a resounding no! It was at this time that she started doing Yoda impersonations. She has his walk down and it is hysterical to watch.

Mid month, we went to a pumpkin farm and corn maze. She did a great job of picking out pumpkins, but her moment in the sun came when she got to ride the pony:

This girl loves horses...actually, she loves the concept of riding on things. Every time a new animal (or ficticious animal) is introduced, the first thing she says is "An going to ride ___ (insert dragon, reindeer, etc.)"

I wish I could upload a video (my program for compressing video's does not like Windows 7 so Blogger won't let me) because one evening, An treated us to what I must believe to be a Vietnamese children's song. After getting ready for bed, she came out of the bathroom and started singing loudly and dancing. She started by patting her head, then her shoulders, then her arms and on down. Words cannot describe how funny it was. The part where she sticks her bottom out and smacks it will be a source of great embarrassment in the future. I am so glad we captured it on video - both for the embarrassment factor and because it is close to the last Vietnamese she has spoken.

Towards the end of the month, I arranged a meeting with some local Vietnamese college students - they had been in the country for about the same amount of time as An and were excited to talk with her. It was very obvious that she understood everything they said to her - they would ask her a question in Vietnamese and she would respond appropriately in English. But there was no way we could get her to speak Vietnamese. We tried bribing her with candy, the promise of playing with a cell phone, but she just wouldn't do it. I am still saddened by this...it's one more loss that she has endured.

Finally...Halloween. I suppose you are wondering what she finally choose? We started with a tiger costume, but it wasn't big enough. Then we found an elephant, but that wouldn't do. Sooo...after searching long and hard (and not being able to find a Spiderman costume - but perhaps I didn't try too hard on that one) An settled on the ride on horse costume. Dad went as a doctor and me...well, I'll take any opportunity to wear leggings, a big, belted shirt, electric blue eyeshadow, eyeliner and mascara! After all, I spent formative years in eastern Idaho and if you've seen the girls in Napolean Dynamite - their big hair was nothing compared to ours!

September

2010-01-26T19:52:00.000-08:00

Let's start with the last two weeks of August because it sets the stage for September. After returning from Yellowstone, An and I spent a good deal of time "practicing" how she would go to school. First we scheduled a visit and got to spend some one-on-one time with a few of the teachers and explore her classroom. Then, many mornings, after getting ready for the day,we would walk to her school and go out on the playground or just spend a few minutes in the empty classroom looking around. Some days we spent 15 minutes there, other days an hour. On the last day before the official start of school, An was tempted by her teacher to go outside and have an ice cream sandwich with the other kids. I boldly told her that I was going to go to the store and I'd be back in 10 minutes. I walked out of her sight and watched her walk hand in hand down the hall with her teacher. I waited the 10 minutes and went out to the playground to find that she had finished her ice cream and was playing with a dump truck in the sand. She was happy to see me and after playing for a few more minutes we headed home. Her teacher said there were no tears or signs of distress.

Then, on September 1, our beautiful An started school! I dropped her off at 8am - her teacher meeting us in the hall to reassure her. She showed us where to place An's lunch, her placemat and napkin and then led An to the art room to play for about 20 minutes before class started. At 12:30 my mother-in-law and I met at the school door and went in together. In addition to practicing going to school, we had practiced taking a nap and playing at BaBa and Ba Noi's for a few afternoons. We greeted An (or, I should say she greeted us with a smile) and we went to BaBa and Ba Noi's house where I told her that I needed to "di lam" (go back to work) and it was time for her to "go nap".

She loves school - and has not shed one tear about it. Some mornings, she will grab my legs or my hand as I am leaving and say "no, no momma!" but when I turn her face up to mine she has an enormous smile on it and I know she is playing me. She bursts into laughter and waits for one of the teachers to lead her to an activity. Most days, though, she wants to hide behind me as we enter the classroom so that she can surprise her teachers. It's a cute game that everyone plays with her. It may not be for every family but we are sold on Montessori school. The gentleness and respect that everyone shows for each other (teachers for children, children for other children and children for teachers) creates an environment that An is just thriving in.

In mid-September, we had the opportunity to join the Idaho Families with Children from Asia group for Tet Trung Thu. An and our neighbor Mollie, also adopted from Vietnam, spent the morning making their lanterns for the parade. In addition to wonderful food and people, there was also a Tai Chi lesson that An really enjoyed.

Can't say the same about the climbing wall. But this is an anomly because An spent most of the summer climbing to the the top of the climbing wall in our neighborhood park so she could sit with one leg hanging on each side...

We finished off the month with a few trips to the cabin and a visit with our wonderful friends from North-Central Idaho. Alec and An had a great time together and didn't really want to part when it was time to head home.

One final picture since it is one of my all time favorites. And in case you were wondering, its a rare moment when the girl isn't smiling.

Honesty

2010-01-25T18:05:00.000-08:00

Today, Brian related that on the ride home from school, An told him that "momma going to be mad at An". She said "momma told An to eat all her lunchmeat before eating cookies and An ate her cookies but not all her lunchmeat." Are four year olds typically this honest? To prepare for her homecoming, I first read about the developmental stages of a two year old. Then I read about the developmental stages of a three year old. Finally, I got to stop after reading about four year olds because it turned out that we were actually going to meet our girl before she became a teenager. But its now all jumbled up in my mind - I can honestly say I didn't expect that much honesty from her!

I did tell her during dinner that I heard that she didn't eat all her lunchmeat before eating her cookies (with a smile on my face because I knew that she ate 2/3 of her lunchmeat, a bag of cherries, a load of green beans, a graham cracker and drank her chocolate milk before she ate the 3 Nilla Wafers). She replied quickly "I'm sorry momma, tomorrow I eat all my lunchmeat!". We just laughed and I told her that I was proud of her for telling the truth.

On another note, I have, honestly, been terrible about keeping up on the blog. My friend Shelby is the latest to remind me of it. Since I need to capture a "report" for each month since An has been home for her "baby" book, I am going to post for September, October, November and December in the next few days. Honestly...I'm going to!

I do have to say, in my defense, that it has been far more fun to play with An every day than post about her...

As a teaser for the December post, here's a preview of what we've been up to.

July & August with An

2009-08-27T16:04:00.000-07:00

So it's been a little more than a week but I finally got the pictures downloaded from our trip. To make this easy on me, I'm adding them as a slideshow - just click on the photo below. An had a wonderful vacation - her only complaint was that we couldn't produce a live moose for her. For the 3 days before coming home...and just about daily since we got home, she gets out her animal identification card and says "mom - MOOSE". I had to tell her that it was very unlikely that we'd see a moose in Boise. Brian wanted to show her an elk and tell her it was a moose but I said absolutely not!

Falling in Love

2009-08-18T12:14:00.000-07:00

*I meant to post this before our vacation to Yellowstone and Grand Teton NP last week but it just didn't happen. So now the blogosphere may actually get two posts in the span of a week - please, no heart attacks.*

I had two years to fall in love with An - from the time we got her referral until the day we met her. And it was easy to do - the pictures, reports and videos we received while waiting were filled with her personality. Happy, confident, full of life. Those were the characteristics we anticipated. It is a rare moment when An doesn't have a huge smile on her face. And her giggle is quite contagious. Her ability to jump right in with inquisitiveness and a can-do attitude has amazed us. She is beautiful inside and out.

On the other hand, An had a foster mom that she loved very much. She made it very clear during the first two weeks together in Vietnam that she was not in love with me. Despite her best efforts though, I think it may be happening.

How do I know that she is falling in love with me?

The way she melts into my body when I carry her downstairs in the morning. The first month and a half, I carried her exactly the same way but she was cautious to keep a little space between us.

She now comes looking for me when she discovers something new and leads me by the hand to whatever it is (this happens even if Brian is around).

She occassionaly wants to sit on my lap while she's eating and asks me to feed her.

She has become an incredible snuggle bug in the evenings before going to sleep. The first month & a half she would just happily lay down in her toddler bed, tolerate a kiss from us and go to sleep. Now she'll ask to lay between us and snuggle for a few minutes before going back to her toddler bed.

And finally, there have been a few improptu kisses!

This is only the beginning of the journey...we continue to take it one step at a time. However, we've come a long way - from the days of a raised fist if I even looked at her to the start of this new love, I can definitely say that it was worth the wait.

Pictures!

2009-06-25T19:50:00.000-07:00

The camera cord has surfaced so here's a recap of the last week...

At the Point Defiance Zoo in Seattle with Grandma Lora:

Checking out the peacock:

Caught in the web:

Swinging in the park:

Riding my bike:

Learning to play with stickers (she still hasn't figured out they go on paper):

Swimming!

Back Among the Living

2009-06-21T05:06:00.000-07:00

We are nearly unpacked from the trip. However, the cable for the camera has yet to emerge - thus no photos. You'll just have to be satisfied with words on this Fathers Day.

An has been adapting fabulously to life in Idaho. The first afternoon we were home, she started exploring her room and toys and just loves anything that plays music. Her leapfrog caterpillar (which has the ABC's on it) is by far her favorite and it almost always has to be in the same room as she is. It definitely has to be under the bed while she sleeps so that she can be sure it will be there the next morning.

The first full day home we tried out her bike and by the next afternoon she had it mastered. Last night we took a long walk by the ponds in our neighborhood and she rode the whole way. With bursts of giggles from time to time to signify her excitement with going "fast" or seeing the ducks and geese or running into a mailbox - she likes it all.

She also loves soccer. During our first shopping trip, Brian showed her a soccer ball and a basketball and asked her to choose. She went for the soccer ball and now we kick it back and forth in the yard. She is amazingly coordinated in my mind. I really don't know how coordinated 4 year old's should be, but she can do a running kick and doesn't have to stop the ball before kicking it back at you. I can assure you that I could not do that at 4.

We've settled into a really nice routine and typically go out for a few hours each morning or afternoon. Otherwise, we stay around the house and park. She just loves to meet people and is learning to play with her friends Mollie and Audrey. Today, her Ong and Ba Noi return from Vietnam as they've been touring through the country since a few days before we left. She's excited to see them again.

What a glorious honeymoon! We've had a few 4 year old temper tantrums but they are typically matched to her level of tiredness. We don't expect it to last forever, but we are eating it up right now.

Jetlag

2009-06-17T12:56:00.000-07:00

...is miserable.

More later,
Wendi

Back in the US

2009-06-15T03:59:00.000-07:00

We are happy to be back in the US. Not home yet as we stayed the night in Seattle but we will be soon.

An and I woke up around 3am after going to bed at 11pm. She slept most of the flight from Taipei to Seattle so she has an excuse. I did not. I'm sure it'll take a couple of days to get back on Mountain time.

Brian, of course, is still sleeping.

Anyway, Grandma Lora greeted us at the airport with a big teddy bear for An. An was thrilled! Then we got to come back to the hotel room to play with Kira, Lora's dog, which sent An over the edge with excitement. She threw the ball for Kira, tried to give her hugs (while Kira tried to avoid them) and just squealed with excitement. Chester and Murphy are in for it...she's going to love them to death!

Well back to reruns of the Nanny and Tool Time - TV is such a wonderful thing at 4am...

Signing off from Vietnam

2009-06-13T05:10:00.000-07:00

Well this is it...we are packing up and winding down for the evening. Tomorrow morning we'll catch a taxi to the airport at 9am to start our journey home. It's a good thing since today An decided she was done with having her picture taken:

You might notice in the picture that Brian decided to shave off his mustache and beard today. Interesting is all I'll say.

Tomorrow we fly to Taipei, spend about 8 hours there before boarding our flight to Seattle. Then Lora picks us up at the airport in Seattle and we spend the evening and morning with her before continuing on to Boise. We look forward to seeing everyone soon!

Love,
Wendi

PS - yes, we finished the shopping and no, I did not enjoy it.

Evidence and Musings on Shopping

2009-06-12T05:52:00.000-07:00

Since I didn't get a picture last night of our waiter feeding An her clams, I was sure to take one tonight of the 5 waitresses she charmed.

We went back to KOTO which is a non-profit that takes street children and teaches them culinary, service and English skills so that they can get jobs to support themselves. They don't just teach them to cook Vietnamese street food...but Vietnamese and Western food that would rival any gourmet restaurant in the US. Brian had seafood dish tonight that he said was the best he's ever had (and it was about $8). Anyway, the waitresses were all vying for An's attention and were holding her smoothie when she wanted a drink, feeding her fish and french fries and then carried her around while feeding her a dish of ice cream. At the end of the meal, we ordered a dark chocolate mousse for dessert and they took off with An to introduce her to the rest of the staff.

Thankfully we'd been forewarned that the staff in restaurants would take your child and hold/play with them while you ate. Tonight she was gone for about 20 minutes and when the staff sensed that we were getting nervous, they came over and said she was downstairs with more of the staff. When we walked down, there were probably 7-8 talking to her and stroking her hair. Truly a wonderful place - both for the food and the people. If you are ever in Vietnam, KOTO is a must.

Speaking of good causes, check out the blog of the family that adopted An's foster sister - www.withhonour.blogspot.com. Her dad is the executive director of a wonderful organization that works to end child sex slavery and exploitation. Apparently Stephen Baldwin has selected Love 146 as his charity of choice on a reality show. I hardly watch TV at all so I can't tell you about the show, but if you call a toll free number or vote by email for Stephen, Love 146 receives money to carry out thier work. We're a fan of An's foster sister's family so if you can take a moment to read his post, please do so.

Now about the shopping. I'm just not cut out for it. I know that there are screaming good deals to be had here, but it just exhausts me to shop. This morning we went to the Dong Xuan market and probably didn't spend more than 10 minutes in there. There were so many people and everything was just in big piles and I just can't do it. So then we wandered the street of the Old Quarter, but that was exhausting too. Finally, because KOTO is next to the Craft Link store (a fair trade store that works with the ethnic minority groups) we stopped in there before dinner. I'm just overwhelmed with all the options. It is all beautiful and I can't decide what to buy. I have some more shopping to do tomorrow morning and I have to say I'm not looking forward to it...

Off to bed for a good nights sleep before our last day in Hanoi!
Wendi

Forgot One Photo Last Night...

2009-06-12T00:19:00.000-07:00

For all you "experienced" moms out there...is there anything wrong with letting your child eat a bowl of clams for dinner? A whole bowl of clams? She really likes them...

This picture show's An squatting on her chair (so she could get closer to the clams) at one of our favorite restaurants, Quan An Ngon, a few nights ago. We learned that she liked them on the Halong Bay trip. She had another bowl last night and was so charming that she had the waiter feeding them to her. It was adorable...but unfortunately we didn't get a picture.

The clams cooked with lemongrass costs 38,000d. That's about $2. I think we'll keep feeding them to her while we are here because they get rather expensive in Idaho.

Busy Days

2009-06-11T03:31:00.001-07:00

Bob and Judy left this morning to head south through Vietnam before flying home on Sunday the 21st. As Brian mentioned, they headed to Sapa a few hours after returning from Halong Bay so we only had Tuesday afternoon and Wednesday to do everything else they wanted in Hanoi. Thus no posts because we've been going a million miles a minute. So, to get you up to date...

On Monday, we had a low key day and hung around the hotel swimming and having fun. An finally decided she wanted to explore what we brought for her and she wanted me to do it with her - we had to take everything out of the closet and she was really excited about the sunglasses and jeans:

Tuesday, we had our "interview" at the US Embassy and got An's visa to enter the US. She's official now - the minute we land in Seattle, she becomes a US citizen. It was a breeze, they asked us if our application was correct and to sign a few things at the window and that was it. We didn't even have to go into the interview room.

On Wednesday morning, I headed to the airline office to see if we could get earlier flights. They said there was no availability so I went ahead and purchased An's ticket home (I wasn't able to buy it before showing them her passport and visa - it was being held and that's probably the one thing that has made me the most nervous on this trip...what a relief to have proof that she was on the flight with us). That afternoon, we went to the One Pillar Pagoda and the Museum of Ethnology. Both were beautiful places. In this picture, Brian decided to take An up to the Bahnar communal house:

He may not have been thinking about coming back down:

That evening we went to the water puppet theatre which was truly amazing. I know An got much more out of it than us since she could understand it (it was in Vietnamese of course) but it was a great experience. She pretended to conduct the music for most of the show. They even had a segment that showed Bob fishing:

This morning, Bob and Judy packed up and headed to Hue. Bob found a way for us to get An around in the airports:

After breakfast, we took the hotel shuttle to the Big C - a grocery/department store. It was an experience! The music in the store was deafening. I was happy to head back. When we got back we had a message that we will be able to fly home on Sunday. I was able to easily shift our Seattle-Boise segment so we'll be arriving on Monday instead of Wednesday now. We really do love it here - our only complaint is the heat and humidity - but we will be happy to get home!

One last picture of An and Brian - very hip on the streets of Hanoi:

Wendi

Wendi's Photo Story of Halong Bay

2009-06-08T07:08:00.000-07:00

Rice field between Hanoi and Halong Bay - the 3 ladies asked us if we wanted to help

Our junk boat - the Hai Long Dream

Quick family photo at the start of the trip

An's lunchtime "phone call"

Floating city

Checking out the view

Riding the dragon with Grandpa

Beauty

Surreal Scenery

View from Surprise Cave

An watching a card game and eating lychee

Hanging out - literally

Telling our guide a story

Brian's Novel on Halong Bay

2009-06-08T01:50:00.001-07:00

Our trip to Halong Bay begins even before we arrived to board our ship; honestly it started in the lobby of our own hotel. We were greeted in the lobby by a very nice gentleman with very good English language skills. He and An quickly became fast friends and was a wealth of information about the area around our hotel and in general as we traveled from Hanoi to Halong Bay. Not to be out done we were matched with a driver with the skills of Mario Andretti and his spacious pace car. While our guide would explain the country side our driver would expertly pass busses, trucks, and cars at high rates of speed (usually 80 kmh and above) with a nonchalant look as if this was simply practice for something more challenging to come. The road down was very deceiving as it looked very flat but was full of bumps, and apparently our pace car of a van was outfitted with the motor of a Porsche but the shocks of a farm tractor. Somehow An managed to grab a bit of sleep as she sat sleeping on my lap with her head bouncing all over my chest.

On the way to Halong Bay we stopped for about 30 minutes at a school/shop where young adults in the trade skills would make and then sell their wares. There was a variety of everything; bowl, plates, sculptures, clothes, musical instruments, toys, and a big selection of jewelry. An was upset when we made her leave the musical instrument section but was quickly placated when grandpa showed her a cat. This is the same man who would scold me for petting dogs and such in Mexico and Jamaica. An had a good time with the cat, and for the cat's part it was amazingly patient even when she would heft it around on her chest. After purchasing a couple of paintings and a bottle of water it was time to climb back in our pace car and make for the finish line.

As we came into Halong City, which is where we would disembark, the humidity was stifling. Our driver pulled into a small stall which looked like an area for herding cattle and let us out. They must have unions in Vietnam because as 3 young gentlemen helped us on to a smaller boat for shuttle 5 much older men sat on the stalled area and "supervised" from afar. Our guide went along with us and after all the passengers were loaded we shuttled out to the junk.

I must pause and explain how the shuttle docks; the driver will take off at full speed and drive pretty much straight at the intended target and 2 seconds before the impact the driver hits full reverse not unlike a cab ride in New York or Chicago. Because of this the shuttle is well equipped with 4-5 old tires at the front of the boat in order to cover any areas of impact. Once we bounce off whatever we are docking the engine is then slammed to half and left there so that the boat will stay in place (who needs ropes? ).

Anyhow we boarded our junk and prepared to head out. After putting our bags in our room we were sat down and served a five course lunch. The food was really good and An was able to get in and really make a good mess trying everything. Right after lunch we got underway and the scenery was amazing, it was not the tooth like sea spires I had expected but a collection of so many small islands that from a distance it looked like a mountain range. Our guide told us the bay contained 11,900 individual islands, most of which had resisted erosion and remained in similar condition to what they have been for centuries past. The boat pulled into a open collection of islands along with several other junk boats and our guide informed us that we were to go ashore and look at one of the bigger caves that had been discovered in one of the islands. The cave was amazing and in fact not one but 3 separate caves growing in size as we left one and went to the next. One of the most interesting things in the caves was the lighting; it was floor level movie theater style which meant the wires had to be run through the thick walls and not overhead style like most caves in the U.S. On our way out I once again retained the title of the "world's Most Terrible Dad" as An and I noisily passed the ice cream vendor on the way out of the caves. But from the sounds behind us as we descended I am sure I have a lot of competition for my title. When we got back to the boat we steamed off for about a half an hour and they we anchored and were told that we would be here for a while and swimming time was available. Because I am part Welch and as such am subject to the fair-skinned Welch gene I told Wendi I would not be going swimming in the salt water. That lasted for 2 minutes until An saw the other people on the boat frolicking in the water and made us very aware she would not miss out. I wouldn't call what we did so much swimming as much as maybe gymnastics on a life vest. Since the ship did not have a child size vest I had to don a vest and let the monkey known as An try to flip and rotate me like a gyroscope.

After swimming it was close to dinner time and time for An to test her limits with daddy. After finding out that daddy does have limits she started to get sad and began to have a meltdown. Thankfully our guide was nearby and translated what she was saying: "I want to go home, I want to go back". Unfortunately we couldn't tell her we were going back the next day in case she would take it as we would take her back to her foster family. After about a half hour of crying we sat down and had dinner. As she ate some the tears dried up and her mood became better but she was still very tired. After dinner though she got a second wind and we stayed up till 9pm finishing dinner, watching the sun go down, and watching some others on the boat try to catch Pi(small squid). When we went to bed she went right to sleep. Dad and mom were not as lucky as the bed was a flat rock slab handed down from Fred and Wilma Flintstone. Because of her meltdown and sadness we left it up to An as to where she slept and she chose to put me in between her and Wendi sleeping on the outside left. For a good portion of the night she kept herself turned toward me. Unfortunately that did not last and just as I had finally nodded off I awoke to Wendi yelling at me "she's fallen! Go get her!” An had rolled off the bed and still half asleep had not yet registered what had happened. Quickly we got her back in the center of the bed and I slept on her outside.

The morning came with An in a much better mood, and at 7am Vietnam time we had a 5 course breakfast. About an hour after breakfast we anchored off of an island and boarded the shuttle boat for a trip into a small lagoon area inside of the island. We had to go in at low tide because as the guide explained the water would raise so much during high tide that only swimming underwater could you access the same area. It was a very pretty place and could easily hide a small flotilla of speed boats immediately making me think of all the pirates and buccaneers who must have hidden out in several of the nearly 12,000 islands in the bay. After we got back there was more swimming time but we passed this time. However some of the other passengers took time jumping off of the roof and into the water(2 story or so fall). This high diving impressed An to no end and was a complete puzzle to her. We pulled anchor and headed back to Halong Harbor where once again we had another 5 course meal before departing to shore to meet up with Mario and the pace car.

On the way back, in between the white-knuckles our driver gave her, Mom decided she and dad would head for a one day trip to Sapa, a place in the north of Vietnam. So arrangements were made and when we got back to Hanoi we had dinner, came back to the hotel and mom and dad left for their trip. They left Sunday evening and should be back Tuesday morning(Vietnam days +13hours from Idaho). The train ride is 10 hours each way so if nothing else mom's Sapa post should be interesting.

As for us we weathered the night very well having a bed that is space age compared to the slab of slate we had on the boat. After having a good breakfast(a buffet is just as good as 5 courses) we were off to go and get An's health check and passport. The visit to the SOS medical clinic (yes the same one from the earlier post and same doctor luckily enough) took about 90 minutes but 70 of those minutes were waiting on people and paperwork. Tomorrow we go for her Visa which should take about 2 hours; 15 min up front of signing and then an hour and 45 minutes that we either wait in the office or go and walk around and return later. We will be choosing the later. God I love paperwork....

More Parenting Lessons

2009-06-05T05:19:00.000-07:00

No, we haven't hurt her again but I did learn a valuable lesson today. Always have the camera ready! We visited the Temple of Literature this afternoon and when we got inside the altar area An placed her hands together, raised them in the air, knelt down on her knees and bowed to the floor two times. Then she instructed each of us to do the same. I couldn't get the camera out fast enough to capture her doing it but I may have gotten a shot of her showing Grandma Judy how.

We are going to head out to Halong Bay tomorrow morning so there won't be another post until we get back Sunday evening. I'm going to turn the computer over to Judy to finish posting about the day while I get us packed.

We went to a restraunt tonight where they train disadvantaged young people to be waiters and speak English. An was the center of attention. They all spoke to her in Vietnamese, stroked her hair, and were very loving to her. We think it is a combination of her charm and their realization of how lucky she is to be going to the US. It was very moving and made us realize how lucky we all are to have been born in the land of plenty.

Eat your heart out Jim, I had a casserole of green bananas and tofu with tarragon rice. It was yummy, but the best thing was the beer was really cold and not served with ice.

Pictures from Yesterday

2009-06-04T20:08:00.000-07:00

Since we could never deny An's foster sister...here are pictures from yesterday especially for Honour:

Checking out the wading pool

Who needs the wading pool - I'm a big girl!

Safe in daddy's arms

Playing with grandpa

By the way, her arm is just fine. She started using it again after swimming yesterday afternoon. She continues to run around with excitement and happiness. We're going to head down to the childrens play area to see if we can exhaust her before naptime.

A Good Day

2009-06-04T06:45:00.000-07:00

We took it easy today...ate breakfast, played in the room and then went swimming after lunch. No fear whatsoever in the pool. Put her face in the water after the first few minutes and just laughed.

This evening we walked to a brewpub for a beer and dinner. Yes, they have a few breweries in Vietnam and we aim to try them out! After a nice walk back to the hotel we are all ready to pass out which means no pictures tonight. Sorry!

An and I did have a few small breakthroughs today. When we returned to the hotel we were all in the lobby. Brian went off to do one thing and I started walking towards the mini-mart as she was having fun with Grandpa. She jumped off his lap and started running down the hall towards me. When she caught up she wouldn't let me pick her up or hold her hand, but this is the first time she's paid any attention as to whether I was near or far. It's a good sign...

Can't remember if I posted this, but even though we'll have her passport and Visa next week, we aren't able to get an earlier flight at this point. We'll keep checking, but are just as happy to stay here.

Wendi

No Video...Photos Instead

2009-06-03T07:37:00.001-07:00

Photobucket hates me. Or perhaps it just hates video. I think its because we record at a high resolution and don't have any editing software to downsize the files. Anyway, it did let me load some great photo's tonight:

Making it official - signing the book at the G&R

Celebrating with her cake (yes...ours was sent with us from the orphanage!)

Hanging out with dad

Catching a nap after the excitement of takeoff

Enjoying a lollipop from the doctor while on a cyclo ride around Hoan Kiem Lake

Parenting 101

2009-06-03T00:22:00.000-07:00

We scored our first "F" this morning.

In under 36 hours we've already had to take this poor child to the doctor for x-rays. She's fine (at least the doctor is pretty sure she's fine)...but it certainly has been an interesting past 24 hours.

An’s first plane ride went very well – she was so excited about it. They had obviously talked to her about planes as she started squealing with delight when we got to the gate and she saw one. “May bay! May bay” is what she was yelling out (means airplane). I have great video of her during the take-off which I will try to load later. We arrived in Hanoi last night just about 7pm. Since we'd left for the airport at 1:00 we were all hungry and tired. We went to the restaurant in our hotel and had a quick supper. After one taste of my French fries, An all of a sudden decided that it was okay to be close to me so that she could get some more. She was putting them in her rice porridge so that she could use her chopsticks to get them out. It was a hysterical “east meets west” moment. Following that, we came back to the room and crashed.

This morning, we met the social worker at 8:45am to go to the police station to file for An’s passport. It took no time at all. Because the other family that is here is living in Korea, Holt had to make a special arrangement with the government to expedite their passport which was offered to us as well. Apparently this is rarely done and we are happy to take advantage of it. It means we may be able to come home next Wednesday if the flights work. As we were walking back to the street, An had Brian by one hand and the social worker by the other (I had no French fries therefore no holding my hand). She was jumping up and down to be swung and all of a sudden the social worker heard a “pop” and An started crying. She cried during the ride back to the hotel and when we got in the lobby, Brian and the social worker were asking her where it hurt and how much it hurt and we all finally decided that she should go to the doctor (the social worker asked her if she needed to see the doctor and with big tears in her eyes and sniffles she shook her head yes).

So…back in the van for a few blocks to the International SOS clinic. What an efficient place. As soon as the paperwork was filled out, we were whisked in to see the doctor. I think he was French, Brian thinks South African. Anyway, he couldn’t feel anything but said an x-ray was the only way to tell so off she and Brian go to the x-ray room. There was no fracture thankfully – the doctor thought she just partially dislocated her elbow. To put it back in place requires a little twisting and bending of the arm that was already hurting her. He said that once he did it, she should start using that hand again immediately. But she didn’t. So he did it again. And she didn’t use it again. Would the third time be a charm? Nope.
He called another doctor down who agreed that it was probably back in place and she was just babying it because she remembered that it hurt. We were sent home to give her Tylenol and to watch it. If she doesn’t start using it by tomorrow, we get to go back.

A few minutes after getting back to the room, she was laughing and eating her lunch like a goof. Not using the hand, but not acting as if in pain. She is now taking a nap and we’re hopeful that it’ll all be forgotten when she wakes up.
Since we were only going to the police station this morning, we didn’t take the camera. It’s too bad because a picture of the x-rays of her arm would have been one for the memory book!

Wendi

What a Beautiful Day!

2009-06-01T05:36:00.001-07:00

It's official, we are now a family of three! An has held up remarkably well today. We arrived at the orphanage before her and when she got there, once again she jumped into Brian's arms. We had a few minutes to visit before the other family arrived. They were meeting their son for the first time. It got rather crowded and confused, with all the families/foster families but we were told what would happen when we arrived at the DOJ and then the other family went to tour the rest of the orphanage while we said good-bye to An's foster mom.

An was so excited I don't think she really knew what was happening and she didn't want to hug or kiss her foster mom or sister. Brian was too intriguing. After they left, Brian walked around the corner to pay the driver and she panicked. She went after him and then also saw her foster mom near their car and she just lost it. One of the orphanage workers gathered her up and tried to calm her down. She ended up getting into the van with us to ride to the DOJ and by the time we got there she had An willing to be in Brian's arms again.

The "ceremony" was short and sweet. We sat in a area with many other people, were called into a room to sign 4 pieces of paper and a book (right below you Mary Li)and then handed over our gifts and walked out. We then walked about a half block down the street to take a picture of the hospital where An was born. We walked back to the DOJ and found that the person that needed to sign our documents was not there and the Holt staff would get him to sign later or tomorrow morning and bring our documents to the hotel in Saigon before we depart for Hanoi. Did I really expect to walk out of there with everything???

On the ride back to the hotel, An fell asleep on Brian's lap:

She woke up when we arrived and has been on the go since then. We walked across the street to the Pho 24 and found that she can outeat the two of us. She's just learning to use chopsticks so its funny to watch her. She's great at noodles but other items are difficult for her. She showed us she could use a fork, spoon and chopsticks during lunch. I'm not sure if she's been taught to eat everything that's put in front of her or if she was really that hungry. At dinner tonight, she jumped right into Brian's noodle dish which had hot red peppers. She'd eat a bite, ask for water, eat another. At one point, it was obvious she was in discomfort so we distracted her and slid the plate away.

She has just played with us all afternoon - coloring, kicking a balloon and, within about 5 minutes of arriving at the hotel she found the computer:

Every time someone has set down at the computer she's on their lap to play with it. Right now Brian is distracting her with the balloon so I'm finally getting a chance to do this.

Well, it off to bath and bedtime. I should also probably start packing. It'll be good to get to Hanoi and settle in for a little while.

love, Wendi

We're Ready!

2009-05-31T07:26:00.000-07:00

The gifts are packed and we are all anxiously waiting for the morning. Can you believe that we brought all this stuff to Vietnam with us? Actually, we bought the microwave here, but the rest was in one big suitcase which is now available for all the things we want to bring home.

We treated ourselves to a fancy dinner at the Rex Hotel tonight on the Rooftop Garden. I say fancy because it's the first time we've paid over 100,000d for an entree (about $5). I have to admit that I cheated tonight. They had fettucini carbonera on the menu and I went for it (only because Brian wanted some). It was great. I hear from Bob that the gin & tonic's were also well done. Afterwards we walked to Fannys for some exquisite ice cream. Thankfully there is also a Fannys in Hanoi so we can sample it frequently. They have a special on the 1st Friday of the month where its all you can eat for 75,000d. Judy is planning to take advantage of it.

Well, off to bed so we can get up bright and early and get out to Dong Nai. The Giving & Receiving is scheduled for 9:30am and after that we are officially a family!

Wendi

PS - I did figure out the pictures today but obviously did not catch up with posting. We are having too much fun!

Hue

2009-05-30T07:18:00.000-07:00

Since I have a few free minutes, I'll catch up on Hue first before posting about today's tour of the Cui Chi Tunnels and Saigon.

Hue is just an amazing place. If it weren't so hot (I realize that this is TMI, but it was so hot there that I couldn't drink enough water to pee - I just sweated it all out!), I'd head back there in an instant. Next trip will be in the fall or spring so that we can actually walk around without thinking we are about to pass out and die.

The first afternoon we visited the Citadel which is the "city within the city". Hue has an enormous walled area of the city and within that lies the "palace" area that is also walled. Much of the inner palace area is in ruin - it received heavy bombing during the war. Some of the remaining structures have been restored and some are in disrepair. You are just able to wander through as you like...there are definitely areas that they should have off-limits but as long as you watch your step, you can go pretty much anywhere. It's impossible to describe with words:

The entrance

One of the great hallways

I think this was the Prince's residence

One of the many ornate gates

Okay...I am having such trouble loading pictures right now that I'm going to have to try again later...

After visiting the Citadel, we came out a different gate and started walking in the direction of where we thought the restaurant we wanted to go to was. It turned into a very long walk through a residential neighborhood. But it was so worth it! We did let them call a taxi to take us back to the hotel.

The second day in Hue we took a Dragon Boat down the Perfume River to a lovely pagoda. It is still used as a monastary and was gorgeous. You'll have to trust me. Then our driver picked us up and took us to two of the Emporer's tombs - Tu Duc and Minh Mang. Even thought we had 20-30 minutes in a lovely air conditioned Mercedes between sites, it wasn't enough to combat the heat. For Minh Mang's tomb, we had to walk down a short trail to the entrance. When we got there, we realized that the camera was still in the car. Neither of us had the energy to go back and get it. We are hoping that Bob and Judy visit that one on their way through Hue so that they can take pictures. It was the most serene site! If it weren't so hot, we could have spent hours there walking around the grounds. The reality is that we viewed a bit of it from a distance. After climbing some stairs to get a vantage point, we conceded that it was too hot to walk all the way to some of the buildings. I felt like such a slacker, but we just could not do it. I don't think I've ever experienced oppressive heat at that level.

That's all for tonight...I'll try again with pictures tomorrow and post with today's explorations. I've got to get caught up before we bring An home with us on Monday!

Wendi

Meeting An

2009-05-29T07:55:00.000-07:00

The post about Hue will have to wait. There is something much more important to share!

This afternoon we were driven out to the orphanage where An spent the first two years of her life. She and her foster mom were waiting outside as we pulled up. She jumped up when she saw the van and ran up to Brian. She gave him hugs and kisses. She wasn't too sure about me.

We went inside and sat down with the Orphanage Director, the Holt Vietnam staff and An's foster mom. We talked for quite a while and were able to ask her foster mom a lot of questions about An. She showed us how she likes to dance and Brian helped her color and eat M&M's. She was just full of laughter and energy!

After we finished talking, we went to see the rest of the orphanage and visit the other children. I was able to give gifts to four other children whose families are still waiting to bring them home. During that time, An and Brian continued to play - letting me join in for a moment here and there. She's just so full of life! And fearless - Brian was turning her upside down, tickling her, giving her kisses and she just laughed through it all.

Here are a few pictures:

I'm not exaggerating when I say she ran up to Brian and jumped into his arms:

She'd let me get close, but not hold her:

First family photo:

Showing Grandma and Grandpa her coloring book:

Leading dad to visit the other children:

Playing with dad:

Short Update

2009-05-27T04:26:00.001-07:00

We don't have wireless in our room in Hue so no pictures tonight.

It is beautiful here. Amazingly beautiful! We spent the afternoon walking around the Citadel and Imperial City. Stunning! Tomorrow we'll take a tour out to one pagoda and two emporer's tombs before flying to Saigon.

Vietnam continues to exceed every expectation we had and we haven't even met An yet...

Wendi

Safe in Hanoi!

2009-05-25T23:08:00.000-07:00

Good Tuesday morning!

In Hanoi it's Tuesday at 1pm and we've just settled in to our hotel. We need to wait here until the plane tickets are delivered for the rest of our trip and then we'll head out for a little exploring.

Our flights were great (yes, Dad - I just experienced a great 12 hour flight in economy nonetheless!). EVA Airlines has amazing service and the seats are comfortable. Instead of just leaning back, the seat slides out as well. Long flights are the worst for me - I have never been able to sleep on a plane. While I love being in places like Hawaii and Mexico, I am always so whiny about the flight. Brian can just nod off at will. I do the doze off for 15 minutes, wake up because I am so uncomfortable, repeat. Last night, I am positive I slept 6 hours on the flight - an amazing feat.

We were just wowed by the drive into Hanoi. It was beautiful. The airport is about 45 minutes away from our hotel and in a rural area. Saw our first load of pigs on a motor scooter along with a TV and various other things. We've heard, read and watched YouTube videos of how bizarre the traffic is but didn't once feel uncomfortable. Don't get me wrong...it's crazy, but at a slower speed. Haven't yet had the pleasure of trying to cross the street so I'm sure my story will change.

Tomorrow, we fly out at 11am for Hue and will spend Wednesday night there. I am looking forward to seeing the architecture and history. I'm sure we'll have plenty of pictures to post.

Wendi

We Have Passports!

2009-05-22T21:24:00.000-07:00

They were delivered to our front door at 9:03 this morning (along with your package Mary Li). Thank God!

Just a few more things on the list to complete...48 hours from now we'll be close to checking in for our overnight flight to Taipei and then on to Hanoi.

Wendi

Why oh why???

2009-05-21T19:43:00.001-07:00

Must we have so much stress?

Until 24 hours ago, we had been pretty relaxed about all of our travel plans. Really...we've been ready for the travel call since last May when it should have come.

Last night around 7pm I checked the FedEx tracking number for our passports expecting to find them on their way back from San Francisco. Vietnam doesn't do Visa on entry. You have to send your passports to the Embassy or a Consulate prior to departing to have your Visa stamped in your passport. So, after receiving the travel call on Monday, we sent ours off and dutifully checked to ensure that they were received on Tuesday. You can't do this in advance because the Visa is only valid for a month and since we have to be there for 3 weeks, there isn't much room to estimate what date you might travel on. We paid to have them expedited - turned around in 24 hours - so really they could have been mailed back to us Tuesday but definitely by Wednesday.

Back to 7pm last night...the tracking number had not been activated. They had not been sent. I tried to convince myself that I should just relax - there was nothing that I could do until this morning. The reality is that I didn't fall asleep until after midnight and woke up at 4am worried about it. Feel back asleep until 6am. Shortly after getting up, I checked the FedEx tracking system again just to see if maybe it had been logged over night. No break for us.

At 9:30 this morning, I was finally able to call the Consulate. I politely asked if I could inquire about the status of our passports and the pleasant man said please hold on for a few minutes. He came back 4 or 5 minutes later and said that our passport numbers were logged in the system but he couldn't find them. He said they were really busy and could I call back this afternoon?

*insert lots of words that aren't very nice*

So, I found that the Consulate takes a nice long lunch - from 12:00-2:30. That's 3:30 my time. I don't think there is more that one flight to San Francisco after 3:30 so I was a little worried (yeah right...little doesn't begin to describe it - let's call it freaked out!). Believe me, I'd have been on a plane in an instant if necessary.

At 3:30 I called back. (Okay, I might have also called at 1:30 and 2:30 just to see if they really took that long of a lunch.) He said he'd found our passports and that he would put them in the mail today.

Now really...how many times in this process have we heard a promise about a particular action by a particular date? I was most appreciative to him, but knew that until I saw the tracking information, I wouldn't be relaxed.

"Date/TimeActivityLocationDetailsMay 21, 2009 5:19 PMPicked upSAN FRANCISCO, CA"

The adreneline is still flowing through my veins but I may be able to sleep again...

Wendi

The Day We've Been Waiting For!!!!!!!

2009-05-18T19:33:00.000-07:00

This morning around 9:15 we received our travel call! Everything is finally approved and we are scheduled to complete An's adoption on June 1. We should be able to meet her on Friday, May 29 - we hope that meeting her and then having her return home with her foster mom will make the transition a little easier. Her foster mom will have the weekend to convince her that it's going to be okay and we are not scary people!

It's a very good thing that we got travel approval today...at the end of last week, we decided that we'd had enough and bought tickets to fly to Vietnam on May 25. We figured as long as we got approval sometime this week, we'd only be arriving 2 days early. And if it was delayed another week, we'd travel to the central part of the country and Angkor Wat in Cambodia. And if it was delayed even further than that...well we'd figure it out. I'm so glad we don't have to figure it out.

Two weeks from today, An officially becomes our daughter. She's been our daughter in our hearts and minds since the day we received her referral on June 7, 2007.

Wendi

Happy 4th Birthday

2009-05-07T21:20:00.000-07:00

To our beautiful little girl who is still half the world away. Today also marks 23 months since we first learned of you...

Breathing Again

2009-04-07T20:55:00.000-07:00

We have MOJ approval. Thankfully, the MOJ was willing to approve the copy of the file that had to be sent by the Orphanage Director because the original is still missing. Now the file is on its way back to the DOJ to have a letter of recommendation attached for the People's Committee. Hopefully the DOJ will move quickly on this and pass the file off to the People's Committee for the last approval and invitation to travel. We are very close.
Wendi

Of Course There is More to Say...

2009-03-31T11:17:00.000-07:00

Our file is now lost in the mail. The correspondence department mailed it on 3/19. The MOJ has not received it.

The Correspondence Department

2009-03-29T20:22:00.000-07:00

Correction to the previous post. Our file isn't really with the DIA yet. Apparently the DOJ has a correspondence department. And they still have our file. So it hasn't yet gone to the next step for MOJ approval. Because it is waiting to be sent by the correspondence department.

Could there be anything else to say?

We do, we don't, we do, we don't, WE DO!

2009-03-23T20:33:00.000-07:00

That sums up our experience with DOJ approval since last September. But I'm here to report that as of March 19, 2009 - WE HAVE DOJ APPROVAL (actually it may have been March 18 as the embassy says one thing and the agency another). Our file is now at the DIA where it should receive MOJ approval in the next few days. I'll bet none of you remember the post in October of 2007 where I talked about the remaining steps of DOJ, MOJ and then the sweetest, best acronym - TA (travel approval). No, 2007 is not a typo. Today would have marked 17 months waiting for this approval - and, understandably, we are thrilled to be past this step! We expect to receive travel approval in 7-12 weeks. We are so ready to meet our girl!
Wendi

Problem Solved.

2009-02-18T18:55:00.000-08:00

Just a week ago, Brian and I were talking about some of the things we want to do once An comes home. Don't get me wrong...we were discussing important things...but at one point I said that I really wanted to have her ears pierced and that he was going to have to take her. If you are questioning why he would have to take her, feel free to read this post as it will refresh your memory.

Well, problem solved. We received new pictures today from our agency's recent visit and not only do her ears appear to be pierced, but she seems to have mastered dangling earrings at just under 4 years old. Don't think I started wearing dangling earring until I was in my 30's. Wow!

More important than the pictures, we believe we are getting close to the end of this journey. We'll update everyone the minute we have solid news. In the meantime, enjoy the pictures as we are...

Make an on-line slide show at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Wendi

December is Update Month

2008-12-09T19:54:00.000-08:00

And An's update arrived this morning. She is doing well physically but misses her foster sister who is now home in the US. Some pictures:

Wendi

18 Months

2008-12-06T20:44:00.000-08:00

Eighteen months ago today I was setting up for an education fair at one of our largest employers. As I finished getting everything arranged, my cell phone rang with a 541 prefix. At that time I didn't have our agency's phone number programmed in because we weren't anywhere close to receiving a referral. I almost didn't answer the call. But at the last ring before voice mail, it crossed my mind that 541 was Oregon.

The voice on the other end of the line said this is Robin and I have a referral for you. I was shocked.

We spoke for 10-15 minutes as she told me about An and then she asked if I'd like her to send her file. I said of course! At that time, it was minutes before the education fair was supposed to begin so I tried to get myself together. I quickly called Brian but knew that he was in a meeting so I left a message that he needed to call me as soon as possible (I think I remembered to say something like nobody was hurt, but he had to call me NOW).

The rest of the day is a blur.

The next day, I came home during lunch to find the FedEx package waiting on the front porch. I really did give some thought about waiting until Brian came home to open it, but that didn't last long and I tore into it. As I looked through An's pictures, I was amazed by her beauty. I do remember asking Robin at the end of the call which province An was in. I recall thinking that the extra time waiting for approvals was a fair trade-off for how quickly we received her referral.

But who could have imagined that we would be still here, 18 months later, without our daughter. I like to think that in the video below An is pretending to call us. Hopefully we won't need videos and pictures to get to know one another for much longer...

Missing An so bad it hurts,

Wendi

I-600 Approval

2008-12-01T20:55:00.000-08:00

We have it. Good to know that it's out of the way.
Wendi

If you can't say anything nice...

2008-11-28T19:59:00.000-08:00

...then don't say anything at all. That cliche pretty much sums up why I haven't posted for a while.

We were quite hopeful that we'd hear some good news mid-November but its taken me this long to calm down enough about what we did hear to post. It's not that we heard anything particulary bad, but once again there needs to be more "consideration" before the province can do anything (they've been "considering" this since April as far as we know). On a good note, they've promised to decide whether they were going to need even more "consideration" by December. When in December, we have no idea. And it's hard to be hopeful about someone considering whether there needs to be more consideration...but the flipside is that they could just decide to approve her file. We pray that whomever these officials view as their higher power gives them the grace to make a decision in the best interest of this beautiful little girl.

So, I took small satisfaction today in making a small change to the blog description which you can see to the right, just below the clock.

Wendi

Another Milestone

2008-10-23T19:13:00.000-07:00

Today marks one year since we received MOJ approval. There really isn't much to say about it. So I won't.

Missing An,
Wendi

When does a boy become a man? (in the eyes of his mother...)

2008-10-18T19:36:00.000-07:00

As I was picking things up and starting the laundry this morning, I came across a handwritten list of candidates for our state senate, house, county commissioner, and highway commission races on Brian's nightstand. There was only one candidate's name written for each seat. It was undeniably my mother-in-law's handwriting.

Last I checked, Brian was 31.

She and I don't necessarily agree on things political. As a matter of fact, Brian prohibits us from talking politics after the great Hawaii incident.

I'm not saying where the list is now.
Wendi

Comfort Food

2008-09-22T19:51:00.000-07:00

Sometimes you just need it.

Tonight was one of those nights. Brian went for the Tin Roof Sundae ice cream and I went way back to my childhood and had a bowl of graham crackers sprinkled with sugar and covered with milk. The challenge is that you have to eat it very quickly or the graham crackers disintegrate into mush.

Wendi

Update Day!!!

2008-09-14T09:41:00.000-07:00

On Friday as I was waiting for a call from our agency to find out why our I-600 has not been submitted, I saw an email come through with An's quarterly update. Even though I had to open the pictures and report on my Blackberry (can you say microscopic in size?), it made my day!

An is doing very well, healthy and gaining weight. Sounds like she is becoming more of a typical toddler as she defends her possessions and becomes jealous when her foster mom pays attention to others.

No words can describe how much we want her home with us - we've been receiving these updates for one year and three months now...we're ready to give you reports from our own observation!

Now for the pictures:

In this one, she's reading a book we sent ("Where's the Puppy?" in Vietnamese)

Wendi

Extremes

2008-08-29T19:11:00.000-07:00

This has been the worst week of my life...with a happy ending.

On Sunday, I arrived back in Boise at midnight from a wonderful weekend in New Orleans. I met another mom (and friend) that is adopting from the same province. Our files arrived in Vietnam on the same day and have been held hostage by the same officials for ten months - a process that the head of international adoptions for the country said should be completed in 4-6 weeks in a recent interview. Needless to say we needed a stress releasing adventure and the French Quarter was more than suitable. We even received a call from the agency on Friday saying the the head of the People's Committee (top level of government) in the province was going to meet with the officials to encourage them to complete our files. That provided a glimmer of hope.

On Monday we both learned that if the officials didn't approve our files by September 1 we would lose our referrals. Brian and I have been looking at pictures of An and dreaming about our life with her since June 7, 2007. To lose her now was more than I could bear to think about. Our agency was fairly confident that the approval would come, but they weren't going to guarantee anything until it was done. Tuesday afternoon they told us that some of the approvals were complete but they didn't yet know which ones. Nothing on Wednesday. Nothing on Thursday.

Thursday night at 8:12pm a message came through on my BlackBerry:

Hi Wendi,
Just wanted to let you know that all is well - the DOJ provided the needed letter. Will update you more next week, but wanted you to relax.

I am able to breathe again.

This means we have DOJ approval. While we have three more approvals to go, we anticipate that we will travel by the end of the year. Christmas in Vietnam is likely.

An - we are almost there!

Wendi

What a difference a year makes...

2008-06-20T20:43:00.000-07:00

When we received An's referral just over a year ago, we saw a beautiful, yet cautious little girl. The most current pictures at the time were taken about a month after she was moved from the orphanage into her foster home. Here is one of our favorite pictures from that time:

Today, we received our quarterly update. Take a look at the confidence shining through in this picture:

And the sheer joy in this one:

An continues to be healthy and happy. She is speaking in short conversations, walking, running, throwing and kicking a ball and is turning the pages of a book one at a time. She is described as observant and helpful. And she loves her foster mother and sister very much.

To An - we can't wait to get to know you in person...we are confident that the outer beauty we see in your pictures and reports are complimented by an inner beauty matched by none.

To An's foster mother - we are forever indebted to you for the amazing gift you've given this little girl.

Wendi

Milestones

2008-05-08T20:12:00.000-07:00

Yesterday marked An's 3rd birthday and today is our 3rd Anniversary. While we didn't really expect that we'd have An home for this birthday, we had held out a little bit of hope that maybe we'd all be in Vietnam together.

The bright light in all this waiting is that An is happy and well taken care of right now. It is so obvious that her foster family loves her and is taking great care of her. I didn't realize that I hadn't posted pictures of her most recent update, but the proof is in this smile:

The report said that she loves to be photographed - who knows, maybe we have a future model on our hands...

Anyway, Happy Birthday An!
Wendi

touch-up painting or touch of the adult flu???

2008-05-05T22:07:00.001-07:00

You pick...I would add a poll here, but I know which way my friends and loved ones would vote. And some times you just don't need to see things in black and white.

The remodel of An's bathroom is nearly complete. Just waiting for the new countertop after spending this evening touching up the paint. Yes, I am so obsessive that I have to use an artist's brush to make things look perfect along the trim and the ceiling.

Oh yeah, I also found out that I was selected as one of the 40 Accomplished Under 40 in the Boise Valley today. So perhaps I was celebrating a little too hard...my nickname is Wild Wendi for a reason!

Wendi

Another Experiment...

2008-03-09T19:43:00.000-07:00

Don't you just love the Internet? You can publish your husband's funny moments at no cost. We bought a new digital camera for Christmas and this is his first attempt to record a video...

I love you Brian!
Wendi

Experimenting

2008-03-02T20:32:00.001-08:00

When we travel, we want to be able to post pictures and movies to the blog. Here is an attempt at a slideshow...

Wendi

Make an on-line slide show at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Distracted

2008-01-14T20:19:00.000-08:00

I have been feeling quite distracted for the last couple of days. Distracted, tense, unable to sleep, etc. I should be feeling relieved. Two families that are adopting from the province that An lives in received approvals last week which is the first action we are aware of since September. Their waits were much longer than the average time we were quoted for our next approval and we have been preparing ourselves for a similar delay.

I can't possibly express how happy I am to hear about their approval.

But I wonder if the reality of knowing how long it took for them is causing me a little stress. Before they received approvals, I knew that they were still waiting and knew approximately how long they had been waiting. Perhaps that uncertainty, lack of closure, made it seem less real. But now that I KNOW that it took over ten months to receive provincial approval for one family and that it took over four months to receive travel approval for another, it just makes me sad. And when I'm sad, I get distracted. Does any of this make sense?

One of the things that has been running through my mind is the song Anticipation by Carly Simon. I really do love the song - and many others by her! But it's time to make that music go away. I'm not sure that all the lyrics are appropriate for adoption but here are a few that express what I'm feeling pretty well:

"We can never know about the days to come.
But we think about them anyway."

"Anticipation, anticipation.
Is making me late.
Is keeping me waiting."

So now that I've put them down on paper, can I stop being distracted?
Wendi

PS - If you are singing along, just know that I don't think I'll ever look back at this wait and think "these are the good old days".

Update!

2008-01-02T17:17:00.000-08:00

Just before Christmas, we received our quarterly update on An. While it is wonderful to read about how she is doing and see new pictures, perhaps the most exciting sentence in the report was "assigned to the Secrist family on July 10th, 2007"!

First...one of our favorite pictures:

She has been healthy over the past few months and seems to be enjoying her foster family. The report says that she can walk up and down stairs by herself, run without falling, throw a ball, imitate scribbling, and turn on a faucet. It also says that she knows to say sorry when she does something wrong!

The only thing in the report that gave us a start is "An can go to the next house by herself." Hmm, a two year old goes to the neighbors by herself??? Well, I suppose they are trying to show us independent behaviors...

A few more photos:

Did you notice the dog in the background of the last photo? We're hoping that's a good sign that she won't have any problems adjusting to Chester and Murphy!

Wendi

The things I do for An...

2007-11-14T21:28:00.000-08:00

I am sure that the future will bring many statements of this variety, but those closest to me know that what I did today - voluntarily - will probably rank near the top of any list that I may hold over An's head.

I got a shot.

It brings tears to my eyes just to write that sentence.

Not only did I get a shot. But I have to get AT LEAST two more for the Hepatitis A/B series and who knows what else. It is probably better that I don't know what else right now because it was a big shock to me that I have to get TWO MORE for this series. I thought it was only one more after 6 months.

To anybody that feels sorry for babies that get vaccinations all the time, I have just one thing to say. At least they don't remember it!

I, on the other hand, have to schedule my own appointments, shake for a few hours after scheduling said appointment, feel the dread building as the time for the appointment comes, consider fleeing the doctors office once I am there, and then come to tears when providing my arm.

MY ARM. It's not supposed to have needles stuck in it. I feel just as strongly about blood tests. It's my blood and my body was designed to keep it on the inside.

I'm sure that I provide major entertainment for the medical providers. I know that I provided major entertainment for Brian today. He has heard me talk about my intense fear of needles but this is the first time he's actually witnessed it.

So years from now when An is telling me that I don't love her or care about her, I will pull this example out. This example of incredible devotion to bringing her home and how I was willing to set aside my biggest fear FOR HER!

Wendi

Final Countdown

2007-10-23T21:09:00.000-07:00

Today we recieved word that the Vietnamese government had accepted our dossier. Our agency forcasted that it will be about 7 months and a few days until we get our provincial approval, and then eventually our travel orders. That means that we will probably travel sometime around the middle of June.

Often times we will find ourselves talking about what we think will happen and what could happen. Our thoughts will wander from the project that we are working on to a little girl far away who has heard little about us and looked only at a small sample of pictures that we have been able to send over. I cannot image how she must feel or how she will feel when the day arrives for her to begin her new life with us. Perhaps she will feel the same joyful awkwardness that we look forward to and the tingle that comes from two very simple words; "mommy" and "daddy".

Brian

DTV

2007-10-09T19:51:00.000-07:00

First hurdle down - our dossier is on its way to Vietnam! What a relief.

DTV stands for "Dossier to Vietnam". Just one of the many acronym's in the adoption world. I had to search for a list when we first started the process because I had no clue what people were referring to on their websites, blogs or forums.

Did you know that we are PAP's? That's prospective adoptive parents. Once An comes home, we get to drop the first "P" and become AP's.

Coming next is MOJ, DOJ, TA and G&R. I think that's the right order - but I'm sure the agency will let me know precisely which one is which when the approval happens. I'll even wait to share the definitions - a little an-ticipation for the rest of you. Just know, though, that when we get to G&R, we'll be in Vietnam with a beautiful three year old in our arms.

Happy, happy day!
Wendi

From Here on Out...

2007-09-26T20:40:00.000-07:00

Now that our dossier is out of our hands and into others, we will get updates as it clears each hurdle. We have no control over this process. Things will happen when they happen. We have a record of when they have happened for the families that have completed adoptions from Dong Nai Province before us, but past history is no indicator of future performance (where have I heard that before??).

Today we received a message from our agency. Everything is in order with our dossier and it's on its way to San Francisco. That would be the Vietnamese Embassy in San Francisco. See, once everything in our dossier is notarized, it has to be certified by the State that the notary is indeed licensed and able to notarize. Then the Embassy authenticates that the State is indeed a State in the United States and is authorized to certifiy that the notary is licensed and able to notarize (okay...I'm projecting here - I really don't know what the Embassy is actually authenticating but this sounds like a good story).

So...we are on the way to San Francisco! Our next update will be when we are back from San Francisco and on our way to Vietnam. We are living vicariously through our dossier these days!

Wendi

Beginning the Journey

2007-09-18T20:26:00.000-07:00

Before Brian and I got married, we talked about adoption. We didn't make any decisions, but we opened the door. After being married for about a year and a half, we started talking earnestly about starting a family. And adoption just made the most sense to both of us.

We thought we had settled on China. But we needed to wait until Brian turned 30 to start the process. Two and a half weeks before the big '30', we learned that China was changing their rules and unless we could get our dossier logged by April 30 we would not be eligible for another 3 years. So we called the agency we had planned to use. They hated to disappoint us, but they didn't really think it was feasible - it would be just too close with getting Immigration approval.

So we regrouped. We investigated domestic adoption. It wasn't for us. Then we started looking at other countries and Vietnam just felt right.

And every time I look at this face, I know just how right it is.

We spent some time choosing an agency - it is far more important to us to complete an ethical adoption than it is to spend a few extra months in the process. The agency we chose, Holt International, pioneered international adoption and is considered a leader in ethical adoptions. They were the first to be licensed in Vietnam after a 2+ year shutdown and they provide humanitarian relief to kids and families. Their first priority is to reunite families by trying to improve their economic conditions so that they can support their kids. When that doesn't work, their second priority is to facilitate an in-country adoption. We are their third choice. That is okay with us.

Holt is not in our state so we had to use an approved provider to do our homestudy. We applied to Holt at the end of January 2007 and submitted all our paperwork to our homestudy agency on February 11.

The homestudy is not a fun process. It's rather invasive. It's frustrating to think that any teenager can just get pregnant, but we have to have our lives examined and prove that we will be good parents. But it is for the protection of children and we lived through it.

Our homestudy was accepted by Holt on May 11. We were told that we were 33 on their informal waiting list (it's informal because each family may be open to different ages, gender, and medical conditions - therefore referrals don't always move in a linear fashion) and that we could expect a 12-14 month wait for referral. Imagine my suprise when I received a call in JUNE with An's referral! We formally accepted her referral on July 11. It is very typical to have a child's medical file reviewed by an international adoption medical clinic (we used the University of Minnesota) and that accounts for the time between referral and our acceptance.

On July 12, I hand delivered our I-600A application to USCIS and they fingerprinted us immediately. We were told we should have our approval in 2-3 weeks which definitely did not end up being the case as we received in in the mail TODAY (that's 75 days, if your counting).

In the meantime, we prepared the rest of our dossier so that it would be ready to go as soon as we received our I-171H approval. Tomorrow I will get everything state certified and overnight our dossier to Holt. Once they receive it, we estimate 9 months before we receive travel approval.

Wendi